- It is hot today on this planet called "Sanity". Very hot. Hot enough that there are none of those biting insects the locals refer to as "mosquitoes". Nasty little creatures, known to suck blood. Seems they avoid heat. I have not seen one yet but I understand they travel through the air, in swarms" only not when it is hot.
- No mosquitoes! be a good time for an EcA, which I remind you means "Extra cottageihicular Activity." Why did my spell check underline "cottageihiculr"? It's a word! Only the truly sane in Sanity knows its meaning.
- I am prone to take these colourful sticks, called "Nordic Walking Poles" known in Sanity to balance the body on a venture known as walking. Why would anyone walk? I ask myself?
- The first peoples in Sanity drive odd gasoline eating creatures called cars, semi-proficient vehicles that are a semi-sufficient mode of transportation but their odour is putrid, or so I have been told. You see I have PD which has robbed me of the operations of a nose. Drive or walk? Not a difficult decision. Walking is the choice of most in Sanity so I will follow suit. My choice is to walk like most of the residents in Sanity.
Uptight
Naked ape is out of sight
Starts his day
When he walks away
Feelin' good
But with legs of wood
Beware
Trouble's there
This I know
But I've got to go
Obsessed yes
This will be a test
Shall I turn around
Go to safer ground
Can't stop
I begin to drop
Slow down; Don't frown
People will see you falling down
I walk so slow
To a grassy knoll
Want to sleep
But I'm in too deep
Make them them think that I have no care
But I see many people stare
Must sit and rest
Yes, I think that's for the best
Call my daughter and she
Agrees to pickup me
Takes me back to the safe place that I left
This walking gig will be my death
I would tell you now and you'd agree
Walking scared the hell out of me
But this affair will set me free
No more walking
It is just pure insanity
That about sums it up. I went insane, a state of affairs caused by an obsession to continue on walking. I see now why the people on this planet prefer cars. Near the end of my walk, aided by my poles, I was moving at glacial speed. I was in trouble and I could hear people whispering about me. Hence, I sat myself on the grass and sent out a signal of distress. It was picked up by my daughter who took me home. Now I fear, I am too afraid to try to walk more than a nanobyte of a mile.
Look it up.
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