Of Cramps and Old Guy Fawkes

Lord, confound this tired mister,
blight his brow with blotch and blister,
cramp his legs & style and rhythm,
in his guts a galling give him.

With apologies to whomever wrote the original of his curse. It personifies my cursed condition. Last night the "beast" returned - ie - severe cramping down the sides of my legs, my right far worse than my left. My right foot started to turn inward and upword. I got out of bed and stood and watched some fireworks go off on the TV.

My mind began to drift. I was once again 10 years old in the village of Amesbury, Wiltshire, England. We were renting the local mansion house and were to provide fireworks for the village on Guy Fawkes Day. The anticipation was great as, through the windows of houses around a field, we watched my father gingerly carry a box of fireworks out onto the common. He took out a large roman candle which promised to be a spectacular explosion of colour. He carefully lit the fuse, but there was no blossoming into a yellow spider but rather the thing sputtered a few feet into the air before falling to the ground. Everyone sighed until the next explosion which was incredible. A wall of fire and light. "That was a good one!" my mother said to me as my father entered the room to tell us that a spark from the first roman candle had landed in the box of fireworks and set them all off at once!

We children were left with pinwheels and lady fingers to celebrate the holiday but our disappointment was ameliorated by the huge bonfire burning the effigy of Guy Fawkes. It was a memorable evening of my first and one and only Guy Fawkes celebration.

As usual, after 5 minutes of standing still, the cramp left me and I was able to get a decent nights sleep dreaming about that bonfire and Guy Fawkes going up in flame.

I awoke this morning feeling exhausted after a good sleep. This PD will never let me feel refreshed, no matter how long I sleep. So, to all those researchers out there, remember what Guy Fawkes once said, "A desperate disease requires a dangerous remedy."

Get on with it, will you?