<h1>Don't want to end up a cartoon in a cartoon graveyard</h1>

Well, we are off to Paris in September. I am not looking forward to the trip over the Atlantic. It is not the first time I have been overseas and I give away my age by telling you travel in those days was by ship. We crossed the ocean both ways on The Empress of Canada, an ocean liner. It took us 5 days each way. It wasn't so bad. My brother and I were young and a ship is a fabulous playground. We were impervious to danger, even after the life boat drill, complete with floating vests and having to go to our stations. The thought of a disaster never occurred to us. And to make it all the better, we had our own stateroom. It was a splendid, slow and luxurious way of travel.

Unfortunately, this trip to Paris will not be by ship of course.

Flying is not my favourite way of traveling. I expect it to be the hell I have found flying to be. Getting through security can be a long, tedious, process, especially if you have PD. Once on the plane, if you are not up front with the elite, you are behind the curtain with the babies. There are always babies or impatient little ones. Usually they don't bother me but if I don't get any sleep flying over the ocean, I will deplane a tired, miserable and cranky old man.

And then there is that little doubt about how that heavy time machine can change from a roaring locomotive into a metal bird. I understand the physics of flight but occasionally I doubt that it is real and see myself falling into the ocean. These are fleeting doubts and logic and statistics tell me dropping out of the sky is unlikely. After all, in the words of Shelly Burman, "flying is the safest way to fly". And, "I don't know how much consideration they have given to walking when they say flying is the safest way of travel" And "why do they have to call the airport a 'terminal".

For the most part, I have not had a fear of flying for 30 years, until now. It has nothing to do with the plane and everything to do with customs. If I become one of the "chosen ones" to be checked, the little stress it might cause could turn me into a quivering mess ("he seems nervous about something") and when forced to talk, my speech would be quiet and punctured by long pauses as I look for the right words ("I think he is hiding something, let's check his luggage")where they would find my medicine, in prescription bottles, and ("hmm. Do you think we should check if they are really what the bottle says.")

Now, I have travelled to the USA many times and have never encountered this, but as my condition worsens, you never know. I can hear myself getting off the plane, exhausted and angry, and turning into a fair facsimile of Foghorn Leghorn when confronted by a young customs officer. "Pay attention son, look at me when I am talking to you son, I have PD, I say PD. You don't know what I am talking about? Well son you are just about as sharp as bowling ball. Is any of his sinking in. I have the shaking palsy"At that point I might be arrested. No, that wouldn't happen because by my nature, I will do everything they ask and more, in a very pleasant manner.

Perhaps I worry too much but I am pretty sure this will be my last trip overseas. I just don't have a Marco Polo nature.

Speaking of traveling overseas, here is a quote from Britney Spears.

"The cool thing about being famous is traveling. I have always wanted to travel across seas, like to Canada and stuff"

Pretty and talented, but as Foghorn would say. "Kind of reminds me, I say, of Paul Revere's ride ---- a little light in the belfry."